It’s Not You; It’s Me…

Such hard words to hear…  because you KNOW it isn’t quite what’s meant.  I mean it IS, but it’s a statement of mismatch… you didn’t do anything wrong except BE YOU… which isn’t working for me… Only this time I'm you... ifyouknowwhatImean...

So I’ve been on the receiving end of a little heartbreak…

A big heartbreak, actually.

My agent for my YA stuff, the fabulous Amy Tipton, has broken up with me… She was really nice about it—felt terrible. She has just been looking over my revised Kahlotus Disposal Site and got to feeling like she just isn’t the right person.  She thought I wouldn’t have any trouble at all finding new representation—nothing she specifically thought I should do before sending it out again. She even passed on a few names and a few different agencies she thought would fit me better.  Our visions just aren’t quite compatible. She said she loves my writing and knows I’m talented and promised to remain a fan… it is just the collaboration piece…

I’m not sure what to do with this… I’ve felt like things were settled for a while… I haven’t shopped for an agent actively for two years and strangely, in that time, accumulated two of them. Now I’m back down to one, but Ellen is project specific—just the cozies… I think she’s a great fit for my mystery stuff but I need to head back into shopping for an agent for my darker stuff.

Not yet though.  I mean soon.  But I need to let this settle.  Sort of like a relationship—if I dive in too fast, I might settle for any old person, and the sex might be fantastic… wait, what?  No, seriously—I think I need to really look at some personalities… stalk people a while if I think they’re a good fit, rather than just desperately groping for the first person who will have me. After looking, I will Query people who I think I might manage a mind meld with. Because they are out there—I know MANY people like that—people I meet and know right away that we get each other. Surely one of them is a literary agent. I just need to FIND HER.

So I think the PLAN… (oh how sad… I can’t make myself cackle when I say plan… it’s a dark day indeed)

1)       Finish writing A Shot In The Light.  I can’t lose the momentum on this—I’m nearing done. And I KNOW the query thing is a MAJOR creative block, so until this rough draft is complete, I’m not even going to think about it. My deadline is the end of July.

2)      August:  HARD COPY, I will edit What Ales Me. With my online time I will make a list of the agents I think may be a match, including Twitter and blog info, if there is any so I can keep track of them for a while. Start with website. ALSO look into their authors I think might be sort of similar to me.

3)      Pull together my KIT info:  Query letter, synopses (a couple lengths)—get it all set so as I query, I just pull out what I need as I need it.

4)      September I will query and send What Ales Me to first readers. THEN I will begin my first revision of Medium Wrong.

I will give myself August through October to edit and query, then I know I need to step back. If I am doing a WriMo in November (meaning WHEN I do a WriMo in November) I need to have this stuff off of my emotional radar. I may not have an agent by that point... in fact knowing the speed of these things, I probably won't. But I will have done a few query rounds, hopefully have had some full requests... I will set aside thinking about it until AFTER ABNA entry in February...

One thing this DOES mean, is I am now free with my YA stuff instead of just my adult, so Medium Wrong may be my best ABNA BET... Or maybe not... I was intent on A Shot in the Light, but at 120K when it's done and two other editing projects before I get to this... I just don't imagine it will be quite polished in time... That particular piece, I suppose I can play by ear.

Anyway... I hope you will pardon me while I nurse my wounds for a bit...

The Good Push

You know, I think this is what working with a publishing pro is about...

What do I mean by that? Well lemme e'splain...

Step One: You Write the Book

And it is good. You love your book. You plan (or not) and you write and then you revise and you make it PERFECT for how you think the story reaches its conclusion in the best possible way. And you give it to peer readers and many of them have REALLY great feedback... but it is... you know... basic... 'your villain needs to be fleshed out better', 'your hero is shallow, maybe give him a REASON', 'the killer is too obvious'. But none of these are GRAND changes...

Sometimes you decide on your OWN to do something wacky... like say... Point of View change...

The Pros

And then you send it out to somebody who has more control of THE GATE. And they have a BIG idea... and you feel... erm... defensive... because they aren't giving you small tweaky suggestions... they are saying 'I will only pass you on if you change this BIG thing.' But they COULD pass you on, you see? So you argue and complain... INTERNALLY... but ya know... Ya GOTTA do it... it's your CHANCE!



Lo and Behold... they KNOW Something...

After you are DONE arguing with nobody (because you KNOW you're gunna do it, ne?) you get to work... and it pushes you to rethink rationale... it tests your creativity... it pushes that story OUT of its nice linear logical line into the INTERESTING...


So how do I know all this?


BECAUSE IT'S HAPPENING!!!

I sent Kahlotus to my agent when it became a semi-finalist at ABNA. I knew it wasn't done, but I wondered if some RANDOM agent might spot it and like it and before that happened, I wanted to give Signature Literary first read... Ellen doesn't do YA, so she passed it to her partner Amy... who LIKED IT...

But the changes she wanted were NOT insubstantial.

I had three points of view, she wanted ONE.
I needed more fleshed bad guys.
The plot needs some tightening...

But the BIGGIE... is...

My ghost can only be seen by a handful of people. And I'd thought fairly carefully about WHO could see GHOSTS... but I'd written it so all the main likeable characters could see her... (only 4, but yeah, okay...). My agent said it was too much... the teacher, fine... the schizophrenic, fine... but I needed to PICK between Serena (the #2 important character) and Daniel (an open-minded boy)...PLUS... I needed to make one of the BAD GUYS see her.... DOH!

But, but, but... my conception of open-mindedness... doesn't GO with bad guys... erm... (that might reflect my politics, but hey...).


And I was all set to cut Daniel out of view when it occurred to me...

How BIG would it be to develop a close friendship with somebody you COULDN'T actually see and hear? The watcher... the protector... may or may not BE there... they have to communicate THROUGH people... who are slowly disappearing from their shared space... but they still NEED each other...

I sort of fell in love with this challenge... with how much more interesting and unexpected the final product would be...

But I never would have gotten there, had I not been PUSHED...

So there.

Anybody else have a transformative experience with a pro?

Twelve Twelving Twelvsies

*shifty*

Okay, so it is straining the holiday thing a little, but last year I did the twelve days of Christmas and really liked it... but I don't want to do the same thing!!! But I thought maybe if I did twelve lists of twelve that that was sort of the spirit of the thing, even if it is really 144. And THEN the things don't need to be alike AT ALL except that they will be clustered... so there you have it.


On the first day of Christmas, her Tartness gives to you, Twelve Themes for holiday fun!

Twelve Themes that may or may not appear in the Twelve Days of Twelving...

*  Lovely man butts (which would most likely occur December 17 in honor of my Wenchie friend's birthday)
*  Detours in my editing process
*  Excuses for not having followed through on the eating plan for twelve full months!
*  Books I really mean to read.
*  Reasons I am thankful for my bloggie friends
*  Holiday treats!
*  Annoying shopper charicatures
*  Favorite books ever
*  Animals in my (fantasy) menagerie
*  Plans for Christmas vacation
*  Sentimental Christmas memories

Though I reserve the right to change my mind, because... you know... that's what I do...


In OTHER NEWS

I got feedback from my agent last night! She likes the book and characters, but... oh, lets put it in (part of) her words:

Hi Hart,

I’ve read through this and I think it’s almost there.  You’ve done a great job with the setting, complex cast of characters and a tricky story line – well done! 

I’ve attached the manuscript with some comments and edits – mostly small writing things like rearranging sentences for better flow, taking out repeated words, etc. 

There is one big thing  -- I figured out who the killer was about halfway through (I marked where)! 

I've stopped there, so as not to give too much away, but I DO have some editing to do... I either need to lighten clues on the SAME suspect, or change killers... in my mind, both are equally likely at this point... in fact MAYBE it is time for a little CRUELLA treatment... (she asked to be deferred earlier, but said December might be just right!)

SPEAKING OF CRUELLA!

My buddy, who henceforth will only go by her pen name because she is now involved in International Politics (I am TOTALLY serious!)... turned in her master's thesis in November and tested yesterday and GOT AN A on her comprehensive exams (coining the term Examinators in the process... nothing better than Cruella's words that are better than those already available) but HENCEFORTH, you can CALL HER MASTER!!! Seriously. She's DONE. I have a master's degree myself, so I KNOW what a big deal that is, so drop by and send her some congrats.