Showing posts with label Monty Python. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Monty Python. Show all posts

Thursday, November 7, 2013

A Little NaNo Distraction with Jay Mims

Halo, fine friends!  A buddy of mine is visiting today sharing some distractions and encouragement for those of us doing NaNoWriMo... He is ALSO in progress for the release of his 3rd Cozy Mystery, The Gray Ghost Inn, so it is quite generous of him to spend his time digressing with us!

Welcome, Jay!!!



Hello Gentle Readers,
If this goes according to schedule, you should be reading this while we’re all in the middle of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), and if my experiences from last year taught me anything it’s: 1) Meet your word quota, 2) Don’t forget to eat something (Low blood sugar makes for AWFUL writing), and most importantly 3) Don’t let this challenge overwhelm you!

So, in keeping with that spirit, I wanted to share with you, the Watery Tart readers, Mimsey’s Top 5 Keys to Instant Joy!

1)  ANYTHING MONTY PYTHON!
I realize if you’ve attended college, it’s mandatory that you’ve seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and that everyone’s favorite naked blogger has a smile on her face as she’s reading this. But, if Grail is the only thing you’ve ever seen from this group, you are selling yourself short.
Each member on their own was a comedic genius, but when put together made something absolutely fantastic. If you want a good laugh, check out some of their stuff. And remember:

NO ONE EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!

2) BELIEVE YOU WILL SUCCEED!
I know it’s kind of built into us as human beings to sometimes get jealous over the success of others. We can be competitive, we can sometimes only see our own faults, and we feel like everyone’s winning but me.

But, don’t play that game. We are all artists here, and we aren’t in competition with anyone. We are about pouring our hearts out to the world, and trying to tell the story that is burning to get out. Because if you don’t create that art, you will explode! Just remember, "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts." - Winston Churchill. And even if no one else thinks you will succeed, there’s someone who does:
3) CAVORTING ANIMALS!
Trust me; nothing breaks the monotony of pounding out the misadventures of a sardonic detective like watching animals at play. And when you’re writing about murder in a small Southern town (which I totally am!) you need a little joy.
I have to admit, I’m a dog person. And for some reason, I find dog shaming to be hysterical. Mostly because I’ve been around enough dogs to know they’re just going to do the same thing five minutes later.
4) FAN VIDEOS!
 
I’m entirely convinced that, within five years, my characters will have a rabid fan base making loving videos set to Evanescence songs. Until then, I’m content watching videos crafted with care and tenderness.
And an overt fascination on cuddling.
5) LIVING THE DREAM!
Ever since I was a little kid, I have always wanted to go to Hollywood with a frog, a bear, a dog, a chicken, and a pig. See, in this scenario, I was always the weirdo.
And you know what? I’ve written three books, I’ve got a great day job as a teacher, and I get to blog about werewolves. Oh yeah, and I’m getting married. Sorry ladies, I’m going to be officially off the market here soon. Though, judging by my inbox, some of you take that as a challenge.
Jay Mims wants to make a fan video for Hart Johnson, set to the theme of “Hart to Hart”. He lives with a passive-aggressive Dalek named Steve, a lizard named Bob, feeds a cat he calls Eartha Kitty and recently rescued a kitten named Meowleficient. He writes books and is far funnier on Facebook then in real life. He is terrible at Twitter. His latest book "The Gray Ghost Inn" is available now. Feel free to email him here.



A wee bit about the book:  Private Investigator Dan Landis just wants to have a nice relaxing vacation with his best friend, Leroy Brown. They've got two rooms booked at the luxurious Gray Ghost Inn in beautiful Warrenton, Virginia. Everything was all set except now Abbey, Dan's new partner, has decided she wants to go too. And wherever Dan and Abbey go, trouble isn't too far behind. Dan, Abbey, and Doc get snowed in with a crazy crowd: Betsey Butler, the Southern Belle hostess; her obnoxious brother Dave "Big Bear" Butler; and Dave's ex-wife, Em. When a body turns up in the library, Dan realizes his simple vacation isn't so simple anymore. And what's worse, he's trapped in the Gray Ghost Inn with a killer. Jay Mims, author of The Five Santas and Cult of Koo Kway returns with his unique brand of storytelling, taking readers on a wild and entertaining ride into the eccentric world of Dan Landis and friends.


Monday, April 15, 2013

Manatee, Monty and Milchman


Look how nice they look!
Manatees are so cool. They just chill, being all groovy...

I'd so love to swim with them.


Magical Monty Python

Anyone who knows Monty Python pretty well and sees my self-appointed title (Watery Tart) knows I'm a fan. Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail is my favorite movie EVER and Life of Brian is a very close second. But just LOOK at these nuts. Can you think of people it would be more fun to hang out with? Because I just can't. Michael Palin has always been my favorite, though I love all of them in most of their forms. They just really are the best possible argument for always being as silly as possible. Life is just more fun that way.

Here are a few of my favorite clips:

The one my name comes from
The French Taunting
The Romanian Grammar Police
Spank Me!
Knights Who Say Ni!
What Have the Romans Done For Us?


Jenny Milchman and Cover of Snow

The next book in my TBR pile is one I am VERY excited to get to. Jenny came through Ann Arbor recently—her family is going a real live drive-all-over book tour. She is one of my ABNA buddies and is FANTASTICALLY supportive of her fellow writers. Here is the blurb for her book:


Waking up one wintry morning in her old farmhouse nestled in the Adirondack Mountains of New York, Nora Hamilton instantly knows that something is wrong. When her fog of sleep clears, she finds her world is suddenly, irretrievably shattered: Her husband, Brendan, has committed suicide.

The first few hours following Nora’s devastating discovery pass for her in a blur of numbness and disbelief. Then, a disturbing awareness slowly settles in: Brendan left no note and gave no indication that he was contemplating taking his own life. Why would a rock-solid police officer with unwavering affection for his wife, job, and quaint hometown suddenly choose to end it all? Having spent a lifetime avoiding hard truths, Nora must now start facing them.

Unraveling her late husband’s final days, Nora searches for an explanation—but finds a bewildering resistance from Brendan’s best friend and partner, his fellow police officers, and his brittle mother. It quickly becomes clear to Nora that she is asking questions no one wants to answer. For beneath the soft cover of snow lies a powerful conspiracy that will stop at nothing to keep its presence unknown . . . and its darkest secrets hidden.



Monday, January 28, 2013

Allow Me To Introduce Myself

I'm a girl of wealth and taste...

Wait, that's not right. Wealth seems to keep elluding me, and as to taste... I can't really condone that. I just don't believe in it, except where food is concerned. So what am I on about?

TODAY is a day where the blogging writing community is hoping to welcome oodles of newerish bloggers by making it easier for all of us to get to know each other. If you want more info, or to sign up, go check it out HERE.

And as usual, I see I've forgotten to follow directions... too many words. Any sticklers on rules, just read the purple part:


ALL ABOUT ME!

Erm... yes, well... that IS what I'm supposed to talk about, yes? Is it wrong I like that?

*cough*

I am four score blondes and brunettes between the ages of 16 and 19 and a half... wait, that's not right... but it DOES get to the explainer about Watery Tart, my online persona... she sprang from Monty Python in all the absurd silliness I could muster. That is who you will generally meet around here (also fitting because I wrote my first several books in the bathtub--still plot there), even though by day I'm a social scientist of some (unfathomable) respect, and when I write books I like to go very dark places.

I just decided when I started blogging that I had enough things in my life that were serious, and I wanted my blog to be something FUN. Hopefully my readers find it fun, too (I think most do).

I still try to be periodically helpful, and occasionally I am compelled to take on a serious subject, but you will note in my labels that the two most frequent topics are 'writing' and 'pure insanity'.

As for me, the writer... What can I say? I have FOMS (fear of missing something, explained here, mid blog) so I join a fair few writing events (I do WriMos twice a year and always enter the Amazon contest(ABNA)). I've written 14 books, a mix of YA and adult—all toward the darker side—classified as suspense or mystery. I've been writing seriously since 2006 (though I had a lot of false starts before that)... actually mastered plotting with fan fiction (Harry Potter), of all the Bizarro World details.

I published my first book last (actually 7th written, but never mind) year under the pen name Alyse Carlson. It's a cozy mystery and part of a three book contract (2nd comes out in May). I'm actively trying to sell one of my YA books and have another entered in ABNA—And just got a KILLER (that's double entendre, by the way) idea this weekend for one that I'm sure will prod at me until I can find time to write it, though I'm currently editing one of my mysteries (top right corner always has what I'm doing).


And I would be remiss if I didn't invite all of you to join the Naked World Domination Movement... I have a theory that naked people are nicer (because they are more comfortable) so I encourage everyone to give in to their inner nudist... And as the title Watery Tart implies... I don't actually want to be in charge when we take over the world, because that is a lot of WORK WORK WORK, but I do want to pick the leaders.

Oh. And I'm obsessed with llamas. And possibly man-butts.

Me, as portrayed by my friend, Rissa