Saturday, September 18, 2010

Confession Time

So you know how this is called CONFESSIONS of a Watery Tart? And how sometimes you get TMI, but mostly you can't send me to jail or anything? And you know how Saturday is my fitness blog?-- my week's admission of physicality as to what is ME? Well today we have a real CONFESSION. I haven't talked to the hubster about it, because frankly, he is in ass-mode—my colleagues at the Microbrewery used to joke about 'his time of the month'--which, when it's a woman offends me greatly—it robs us of our right to be pissed off... but for a man... a monthly week of crabbiness—I can hardly argue. If it were less frequent or more reasonable, I'd argue, but for 22 years my husband seems to have HAD one—That time of the month...

My point? Hubby is crabby and I don't want a crabby response, so I am telling YOU, my BFFs.

First... Nobody panic... This is just me being melodramatic...

So I called the doctor yesterday and made an appointment. Why? I got a pain. Oh, I've TOLD you about the back and shoulder... those seem to be muscle and joint pain and therefore NOT terrifying. THIS pain is... odd.

About two weeks ago I woke up feeling like I'd suffered a bear hug from an overzealous polar bear. My RIBS felt bruised... only on the left, side. But the REAL bugger was not bruising (which never actually SHOWED as bruising... it just FELT like bruising...)... the ribs on my left FELT bruised but didn't LOOK it. I played it down... it's what I do. No big deal... mysterious bruised feeling... Okay... weird, but I am cautious where medical professionals are concerned—no thanx to the DOCS, so for a week and a half, that was something I could live with. Then, yesterday, I got an odd wild hair and bent to the side—little stretching... I fingered the sore side a little... and it wasn't quite right. I bent the other way... and CONFIRMED it wasn't quite right... The left side... the SORE side... has... not a LUMP exactly, but a hard spot... a spot that won't yield to some poking. One side I can squish just a little, poking into my side gut, the other, not so much... It is of note that my RIBS are NEVER where I carry much extra weight and this SPOT is immediately under my ribs, so while I've got plenty of fat on my bod, this is NOT where it sits... that isn't part of this particular mystery, so there isn't a lot of 'what is what' that needs to happen...

So yesterday I made an appointment relating to this 'mysterious hardness below my rib'... And I'm a little worried as to what exactly would do this... the Googled body map makes it look like this is possibly spleen, stomach, maybe kidney or intestine area... Or freaky rib pain... but of course an appropriate paranoid writer type can't QUITE ignore that this doesn't seem right... I''ve decided it must be my spleen *shifty*

That's it... no answers... just fear... I just needed to sort of... let it out there... Appointment made... I'm dealing... just... nervous.



As for the PLAN

I don't think I did horribly (not great). The day I slept through and missed my power walk I made up for, so exercise is on track. Eating was on track MOSTLY... but the scale is arguing with me. Says I am up a pound... hmph.

So there we have it...

20 comments:

Niru said...

Good luck at the doc's! I'm sorry you're not feeling well :( I'm sending tons of virtual crossed fingers your way!

gae polisner said...

I am the world's biggest panic freak. So, anything I say here about being calm and not worrying would be ridiculous coming from me. On the other hand, 9/ 10 times those things are nuttin' so it's seems such a shame to waste worry. On the other hand, worry -- at least for me -- means weight loss, so I like to look at the bright side there.

Hmm, yes everything about this comment of mine is pathetic and unhelpful, so instead, I am going to offer you HUGS.

Let us strip off our clothes (what? the other people reading don't have to watch if they don't like a little girl on girl -- it's just in the name of distraction) and turn on a fan and peel some grapes and lie here prone and sexy and just breathe. :)

Mason Canyon said...

Here's hoping it's just a pulled muscle or something minor. But, it's good to have it looked at anyway.

Mason
Thoughts in Progress

ViolaNut said...

Ugh - first Chary, then me, then you - we need to call a moratorium on weirdo Burrower ailments. :-P Repeat the following as needed (with an Austrian accent): It's not a tumor! ;-)

Old Kitty said...

Oh golly! Hang on in there until you see the doc! I am sending you lost of positive vibes and best wishes!!!

I'm sorry that hubby is cranky - I hope he calms down enough for you to share your anxieties - the pain is real and so are your feelings - you mustn't suffer this in silence esp when in a partnership! :-)

Take care
x

Simon C. Larter said...

Ooh, suckage! Yeah, I'm not much for doctors either, but y'know, sometimes you just need to. Hope it turns out to be merely something small and easily remedied, m'dear.

Hart Johnson said...

Niru- Thank you! I FEEL alright--except the worry when I move in a way that reminds me it's there...

Gae- YAY for Naked solidarity! Thank you! I usually am pretty good at NOT worrying and ignoring stuff, but cancer is one of my fears... our family has seen some of it and it is one where it pays to be paranoid, as early caught stuff is usually treatable.

Mason-thank you! It isn't anything PULLED--those feelings I'm familiar with, but it may very well be a 'nothing' thing.

Leanne: YES! It is NOT a tumor! And YES, A POX ON BURROWER POX!!!

Jenny, THANK YOU! And I am used to crabby hubby--unfortunately. I told him about it today, but not about my worry about it...

Simon-thank you! I like the word suckage, even if I don't like suckage, so to speak...

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Hart, whatever it is, you can't do anything about it, so don't worry. (I know you will anyway, but just saying.) Think freaky rib pain.
I take it husband thinks it's nothing? Ha! I'm the paranoid one in this house - wife goes to doctor immediately.

Mary said...

Good that you're checking it out. You'll probably laugh about it later. Take care.

Hart Johnson said...

Alex- thanks! Doing my best to think freaky rib pain. Hubby hasn't expressed one way or the other. I haven't told him I'm freaked... he isn't known for emotional support though. If it IS something, he will be amazing, but it this phase in anything, he is most likely to tell me what to do--something I respond poorly too.

Mary, I really hope so! Thank you!

LTM said...

jesus louiseus! girl, don't go to cancer. You sound like my little cousin who every headache's a brain tumor... :D j/k Do you still have your appendix? I cracked a rib once coughing...

Oh, and speaking of THAT. Man! That was me Thursday... Hubs says, "No wonder you've been feeling fat." ouch! he's lucky I'm not one of THOSE pms-ers. Or that I had a rolling pin in my hand. :D take it easy~

Jan O'Hara (Tartitude) said...

You're not supposed to be Watery Tart because you cry. <----Just thought I'd state the obvious to the universe, so you can have justifiable reassurance this week.

Odds are supremely good it's nothing of consequence, but time to get it checked. Hugs, hon.

Holly Ruggiero, Southpaw said...

Freaky, weird things suck. And waiting sucks. And going to the doctors sucks. It may end up freaky but with an easy fix. I know it’s hard not to worry about it ‘cause well it’s weird and worrisome but do try. HUGS

Al said...

Hang in there.
It more than likely is nothing of concern, but you are doing absolutely the right thing in getting it checked out sooner rather than later.
All the best and we'll all be thinking of you.

Jan Morrison said...

I hate that. did I ever tell you about the time when my kids were teenagers a zillion years ago and they were at their Dad's in Ottawa for the summer so I CLEANED their rooms and in my youngest I found these really suspicious pills and I freaked out and when he came home I had this totally serious talk with him and he said 'mom, they're the stooopid homeopathic pills you got for my allergies!' oh I said and slunk downstairs.
or the time that I was quite sure I had a brain tumour because I was forgetting everything and ron was freaked and so I went to my doc and got a scan done at the hospital and my doc phoned me late on a LONG weekend and told me that I should phone her as soon as possible which ended up being the Tuesday after the Friday call and it was ....wait for it...chronic infected sinuses!!! which are a real bugger ya know but NOT a brain tumour. I LIVE in this body and it is getting weirder and weirder I tell ya so yes I do empathize and sympathize and hope it is really truly nothing.
I'm glad you have a good doc you can go to.xxoo sorry for the ramble but it is late and my brain is tired...

Hart Johnson said...

Leigh--wrong side and latitude for appendix--thinking your hubby might have DESERVED the rolling pin...

Jan O-Can I SAY how reassuring it is to have an MD weigh in with the odds? That really DOES help. *hugs to you*

Holly-I really hope you're right... freaky, but easy fix... that is my hope. I have no qualms at all about being freaky.

Al-thanks so much! Yes, quite a step for me to not wait until it's a big deal--that is normally my MO...

JanM--Oi! We had a 'find from the son' this weekend (some later blog, when I no longer feel compelled to beat him), so I SO FEEL that pain! I'm glad your stuff was sinus and not brain, but brain rest is DEFINITELY good!

Rayna M. Iyer said...

It had better not be what you and I are both thinking, or I will come and bash it on the head with a Power Ranger toy.

All the best, honey.

Lisa said...

I'm with Alex. Try not to worry too much.

I'm very proud of you for staying on the fitness and eating plans! Your scale can suck it.

Falen (Sarah Ahiers) said...

ugh, weird mysterious pains and odd feelings are the worst. Because it's hard to know how much of it you're just making up.

Any news?

Megan Bostic said...

Thinking about you Hart.