E-ppreciation (Elizabeth, Ellen and Emily)

So I finished my first book in October 2008. It was almost a three year effort—finally mastering that demon of 'how do you finish one of these bloody things?' (for me, the trick is knowing the ending from the beginning—if I have a destination, it is much easier to keep going—no pants for me).

I started editing, but really approached it much more like proofreading—I had no clue. The following spring/summer I started blogging and met some AMAZING people and found some wonderful resources. One of the earliest of these new friends (one FULL of resources) was Elizabeth Spann Craig.

Elizabeth

Most of you know her. I was a bit of a crazed fangirl in those early days. It seemed she was doing everything right, so I followed her around and tried to emulate what she did. (I still recommend this as a strategy to master the blogosphere—find someone like this, who is SUBLIME in how they do it, and to the degree you can, do what they do). Now I'm not as organized as Elizabeth, but because one of her strongest features is how GRACIOUS she is, we became friends.

And more than once I heard from her: 'you know, your voice would really be perfect for Cozy Mysteries'. (I'd never HEARD of cozy mysteries--I was writing suspense).  My interpretation of this, since that time, is I am usually funny, but still manage to hold a logical train of thought—to make my point.

But mysteries scared the heck out of me. They were so... TOGETHER! All the stuff had to come in the right order. All the clues had to be there. They had to be paced right. But the seed was planted.

And then the opportunity arose...

I almost clutched, but Elizabeth sent me a ton of links and a few samples of cozies and encouraged me like crazy.

You see...

Ellen Pepus, at Signature Literary Agency...

Had an opportunity for an audition for a cozy mystery series... (two, actually—she let me read both—I bypassed books and chocolate, if you can believe that, but the details of the other one spoke to me more.) Specifically, they wanted a series where the sleuth did public relations for a garden society, and was dating a reporter.

You see... my first degree was journalism. I KNEW these people from the moment I read their (very brief) set of details. I knew the differences in personalities... the drive of each—one for spin, the other for truth... And from the very beginning, the relationship between my sleuth and her BFF was crystal clear. Yin and yang. Calculated versus impulsive, but desperately needing each other to pull toward the middle. Serious versus funny. Rule follower versus rebel. But they FIT. This pairing really drove that first book.

And because you might be lost... These audition gigs come about this way:

Emily Rapoport, a FABULOUS editor at Penguin

had done her research on the market and discovered a THEME, and LOCATION likely to sell, and had suggested some characters—the MC, the sidekick (by name and occupation--baker--only), in this case, the boyfriend, a few members of the Roanoke Garden Society, and a few family members. And she asked for the first three chapters (or 50 pages)


The BIG deal here is that Ellen and Emily were both so WONDERFUL as to look at my novice audition. Emily liked what I'd done, requested a few changes, and THAT is how I got my cozy mystery contract.

And they have ALL THREE been wonderful since—Elizabeth has answered hundreds of questions, pointed me at still more resources, read drafts... and Ellen and Emily have been patient and kind, even when I REALLY goof (which I have—that is probably a good theme for G)

And that is why, in the book coming out in June, the three Es are the primary people I thank. (though I DO try to thank several more) But without these specific three, this dream would not have come true...

The Azalea Assault... coming in June...

Anyone else have a team who got you somewhere important?

Delusional Dominatrix or Dastardly Decoy?

I'm devastating, eh?

So people who've been around here before know I'm a devastatingly sexy hotness of a woman, set on naked world domination, yeah? I'm like Jessica Rabbit, only I really AM bad. I'm all mystery and intrigue, knocking men flat with just a steamy look. You should see what happens when I blow them a kiss... or even just blow. *shifty*

It's why I write these dark, traumatic books and people make sizzling noises when I walk by. Sometimes they even offer me fruit... you know... as a show of how FRESH I am. (okay, so that last might have happened almost 30 years ago and I was in Mexico--and with ojos azules en Mexico, at diez y seis anos... anything is possible)

Still DRESSED like a dominatrix

But the rest of it is true...


Other than the part where instead of LOOKING like Jessica Rabbit, I've got more in common with Miss Piggy...

You know... confident and bossy... and decidedly plumpish... Trying to dress (or undress) to the state of a much sexier woman. Pushing people around as necessary because they never seem to read my mind like I like... And even when they do, they sometimes just need a little extra incentive to do the right thing (which would be the thing I WANT done)


*sigh*

Did you know my home town was formerly Hogs Heaven?

But at least I have the Naked World Domination movement headed in the right direction. Most people are on board when they hear all that is required is getting naked and being nice to people.

And maybe, just maybe, I make more progress with all this world domination stuff because people don't even SEE ME COMING. They look and think 'meh, she HAS to be harmless' (heh.  Right.)  and I get there, crack the whip and make them dance like I like! Erm... in a nice way, of course. They like it. I promise.

I pull it off, don't I? (at least in a literal way?)

So what delusions do you cherish?


Do your looks go with your winning disposition?


Are you naked yet?  It IS Naked Thursday, after all. or Naked Thrustday, as my friend Gae says...


And on the D theme. My buddy Laura at the Daily Dodo has released a book:  100 Blogging Prompts!  You should go check that out, too.  Her C blog has all the details.

And a final DOH!  I totally forgot to be insecure yesterday... though maybe I am insecure that only a couple people signed up for our book release blogfest:  Crazy Cozy Blogfest. if you might be interested, I'd love you to give a peek at yesterday. Because I was SO EXCITED about the idea, but so few people stopped by... I think my title led them to believe it was the DAY OF the blogfest and not an invitation to join it... but it was only the invite... the actually thing of it is in June... on book release day.

Crazy Cozy Blogfest!!!

Hurry! Tell all your friends!

Special thanks to my buddy Joris Ammerlaan for our buttons

Wait. It's possible I should tell YOU first.

See... I have my first ever book release June 5th of this year. And on the SAME day, my friend and mentor, Elizabeth Spann Craig is releasing the first in a new series of hers... Both Cozy Mysteries... both tons of fun! So we thought we'd share the fun with you.


First: What the Heck IS a Cozy Mystery?

Cozy Mysteries are like Mystery-Lite—there is still a dead body (or two), still a mystery to solve, and still lots of twists and turns. But they are low on gore (murder happens off the page), low on violence (happens off the page), low on sex (though not necessarily anti-innuendo or ogling—again, just not on the page) -- the whole thing is kept very PG-- and because the sleuth is an amateur, they are also low on technical forensic or police procedural language, making them very approachable. (and far easier for a non-cop to write)

But in ADDITION, they also tend to have a lot of humor, some quirky characters, a recurring cast, and frequently there is a THEME (Elizabeth's is quilting, mine is gardening).

Now of COURSE we want to promote our new books, but because cozies are so fun, we thought we'd SHARE the fun!


Crazy Cozy Blogfest

The idea is to think of the craziest, zaniest set-up for a cozy mystery you can—this is strictly for entertainment value—we don't plan to take these ideas and actually write series (though if you think YOU want to, go for it!). But we are asking you to come up with a wacky theme, a zany sleuth, a crazy setting for your OWN Crazy Cozy Mystery idea.

Include:
1)  Sleuth (age, occupation, maybe a little family info)
2)  Sidekick (either friend or foil, but someone who always seems to be around)
3)  Setting (town, city, or other sort of place)
4)  Theme (go nuts)
5)  Twist (be as creative as you like)

Write it up in 150-250 words (so short)--for the blogfest portion anyway—we want people to be able to read a bunch of these without too much burden. Keep the traditions in mind, but we are judging on entertainment value--which we enjoy most, not how realistic it is to make a best seller. We want people to laugh.  WE want to laugh. (so consider those rules more like guidelines, really)


And then please include either our book brief descriptions, a brief word of promo, or a link for people to FIND more if they want to (all related info below).

Prizes: (yes, I said prizes! erm...not extravagant, but we wanted to give you something) Each Elizabeth and I will choose our favorite and BOTH winners will get BOTH books (signed).

We'd love help promoting the blogfest, as well. Feel free to take the button and banner and/or share the Linky Tool below. And I'm sure you will be hearing more about this over the next two months.

Quilt or Innocence
Beatrice has a lot of gossip to catch up on—especially with the Patchwork Cottage quilt shop about to close. It seems that Judith, the landlord everyone loves to hate, wants to raise the rent, despite being a quilter herself… But when Judith is found dead, the harmless gossip becomes an intricate patchwork of mischievous motives. And it’s up to Beatrice’s expert eye to decipher the pattern and catch the killer, before her life gets sewn up for good.

Elizabeth Spann Craig: Elizabeth writes the Memphis Barbeque series for Penguin/Berkley (as Riley Adams), the Southern Quilting mysteries (2012) for Penguin/NAL, and the Myrtle Clover series for Midnight Ink. She blogs daily at Mystery Writing is Murder, which was named by Writer's Digest as one of the 101 Best Websites for Writers for 2010 and 2011.

As the mother of two, Elizabeth writes on the run as she juggles duties as Girl Scout leader, referees play dates, drives carpools, and is dragged along as a hostage/chaperone on field trips.

Links:
Amazon
Barnes and Noble
Indie Bound
Mystery Writing is Murder

The Azalea Assault
Cam Harris loves her job as public relations manager for the Roanoke Garden Society. It allows her to combine her three loves, spinning the press, showing off her favorite town, and promoting her favorite activity. She's just achieved a huge coup by enlisting Garden Delights, the country's premiere gardening magazine, to feature the exquisite garden of RGS founder, Neil Patrick. She's even managed to enlist world-famous photographer Jean-Jacques Georges. Unfortunately, Jean-Jacques is a first-rate cad—insulting the RGS members and gardening, goosing every woman in the room, and drinking like a lush. It is hardly a surprise when he turns up dead. But when Cam's brother-in-law is accused and her sister begs her to solve the crime, that is when things really get prickly.

Alyse Carlson: Alyse Carlson is the pen name for Hart Johnson who writes books from her bathtub. By day she is an academic researcher at a large midwestern university. She lives with her husband, two teenage children and two fur balls. The dust bunnies don't count. This will be her first published book.


Links:
Amazon
Barnes and Noble
Indie Bound
Confessions of a Watery Tart

Blogging 'bout Butts

To anyone new around here, you may not know this, but I should let you know before I frighten you. I'm sort of a nut. My first year with the A to Z event, I began the month with the intention of blogging about lovely man-butts every day (Admirable arses, beautiful buns, etc...). It's just sort of the way I roll. I try to keep things PG, but I decided early on that the only way I had a hope in heck of sticking out in this ginormous blogosphere was to be as ME as I could be. And what DEFINES me... what I am BETTER at than most, is I'm not afraid to play. In fact I love it. And I love to encourage others to do the same. Find what you love and who you are and RUN with that.

So blogging bout butts may not be YOUR thing, but I am paying brief homage to this history today with some LOVELY shots of beautiful buns.

I've often said I could watch Nathan Fillion fold socks and be entertained, but how awesome is it when you can watch him in FIREFLY and he gets naked on top of that!?  (WIN!)

 This might be a girl butt, actually, but it is an AWESOME tattoo.

This tattoo is a little more suspect in taste, but he wears it well...

This is a promo for Naked Sunday, something I'd like to encourage everyone to take up...

Some might call him a poser, but he can pose for me any day...

And finally, last but not least...

Oh, yeah...

Hope I didn't scare anyone too badly!

Awesome Alchemy

First, I want to welcome anyone making their way here from the A to Z challenge! Thanks so much to all the great bloggers hosting, and especially originator, Lee, at Tossing it Out. Today is the first day, so if you don't know about this, there is still time to check it out.

Alchemy and Me

I first really thought about the process of Alchemy when a group of avid Harry Potter fans was discussing what we thought would happen in the 6th and 7th books of the series. Alchemy, is of course the process by which the Sorcerer's Stone is made in the first book: a stone said to be able to turn any metal to gold, and produce the elixir of life which can make the drinker immortal.


Alchemy, in brief

Disclaimer: If you want the LONG version, Wikipedia has quite the page. My version is FAR simpler and stems out of how we talked about it in those Harry Potter discussions... My memory stinks, so surely I will get some of this wrong and skip giant chunks--in fact most of it, really, but it still fits what I'm trying to say.

The ideal man through the process of alchemy

The Harry Potter version is of course a little different than the alchemical process discussed in history (legend?)--alchemy, being the PROCESS of turning base metal to gold. This process has three tiers, black, white and red and involves all four elements, each representing a season. It happens in seven tiers—and you might see in just that line how the other Harry Potter themes come up—4 elements also go with the four houses, and in fact, until we learned Ravenclaw's artifact, many of us were sure it was a WAND, because the artifacts for the other houses fit the tarot symbols for the elements: Cups, swords, and pentacle (stone of the ring).

Alchemy as a 'science' really petered out in the 16th century (probably as real science gained a little ground) but as a spiritual journey, the idea lasted longer, and it makes sense—it is about being fully rounded and in balance.

Alchemy in writing

So if the stone that starts black, has to go through white and red to reach gold, the STORY may very well have a similar process to achieve gold.

The black first draft: This has the basic ingredients—you know where it goes and and have hammered out the main thing of it.

The first step is to go through and CLARIFY—turn it white by streamlining the plot, removing the big extras, fill in plot holes, remove any confusion. Do you have the STORY JUST RIGHT?

The next step is to light it on fire (red) (not literally) by pushing at the pacing, rewording for power and sparkle... have you SAID IT ALL in the RIGHT WORDS?

And finally POLISH it to shiny gold—typos, spelling, grammar, punctuation... all those pesky details.


Now I wish I could tell you this makes a tale ACTUALLY done, but honestly, what this makes a tale is ready for feedback—you are probably going to have to do all these steps again... and again... but I love looking at each round of editing this way.

Sad Songs Blogfest

You know... I've always preferred a sort of sad song. My earliest memories of favorite songs are Sound of Silence from Simon and Garfunkle and Seasons in the Sun by Terry Jacks, which amazingly has a cover by Nirvana (win).

So when Diane at Spunk on a Stick offered up the Sad Songs Blogfest, I thought , HEY, that sounds good!

Now my idea of sad songs is probably a little irregular (which should surprise NOBODY who knows me). I am not much for whiny love lost stuff. Romance Schmomance. Poo! I am far more into LIFE gone wrong. So without further ado, and in no particular order:

Hate Me by Blue October

This song is about someone telling someone they love to hate them so that they don't have their life screwed up any further. It is the DEPTHS of self-loathing, but also the purest of love. I dare anyone who's ever loved an addict to listen to this and not cry. Killer line: “Hate me in ways, Yeah ways hard to swallow. Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you .”


Creep by Radiohead

Self Loathing at its deepest. I am too unworthy to have anything to do with you. Killer line: “I want you to notice, when I'm not around. You're so very special. I wish I was special. But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here.”


Murder of One by Counting Crows

This one is about falling for someone who has already cast in their lots with someone who doesn't allow them to really live... controlling or horrible, in whatever way. I find it sad because there is someone there who wants to love her, but she can't take the leap to leave. I'm not sure this one has the killer line so much as a build—he is alternating observations with temptations for a girl he sees as completely trapped.

Joey by Concrete Blonde

Her very voice has a cry to it. This whole CD is really dark—perfect for when I'm in a dark mood. Caroline would work, too. But Joey, I find sad because it is sort of the aftermath... the couple had a lot of trouble because of his addiction stuff, she's gotten angry and left, but here she is letting him know she's not mad anymore... it's just DONE. It is like a break-up is a lot of screaming and fighting, but this is filled with both compassion and a finality. The killer line, “I know you've heard it all before, so I don't say it anymore. I just sit by and let you fight your secret war. And though I used to wonder why. I used to cry til I was dry. And sometimes I get a strange pain inside. Joey, if you're hurtin' so am I.”


Strawberry by Everclear

We're back to my addict theme. I had a few years where this was on my mind nearly all the time and this song came into my life in the midst of it. Art Alexakis is himself a recovering addict (and I've said on this blog before, I think he's the best storyteller-songwriter out there), so he sings it SO TRUE. The killer line, “Ten long years in a straight life. They fall like water. Yes, I guess I fu*^ed up again. Don't fall down now. You will never get up.”


I Believe by Chris Isaak

The only one that doesn't fall solidly into the heavy side of rock, though Chris Isaak sings with a ton of passion.  This song is beautiful irony. The narrator truly believes happiness is possible—sublime love—that it can happen. And then delivers, “But not for me, and not for you. I know you tried. I tried too. But sometimes all our dreams just don't come true.”


So that's probably enough. I know there are more. I could probably go through my CDs and find dozens, but these are the ones that come to mind.

Be sure to check out the other blogfest participants!

And I will see you all Monday for the beginning of the Crazy A to Z marathon! (see upper right corner if you need to learn more)


ANNNNND... Bloody Blogger seems to be having commenting problems--what a hassle. Just FYI--I am making my way down the middle column for the blog fest... Wish i could leave comments. Hmph.

I’m a Right Little Ray of Sunshine!

Another meme… or rather award… I know… it looks like I might lack creativity, but it is actually just that I am submerged in editing and so decided a few days of easy was better than a few days of nothin’.

This one is fun—I love answering random questions… I was given the award from Nessa at Life Love and the Pursuit of a Crawling Baby. Thank you, Nessa! And like I said, very fun questions, so here goes…

Favourite colour: Periwinkle, if we are being specific, but pretty much any shade of purple.

Favourite animal: really depends if we are talking admiration or pet. I’m a HUGE llama fan, and also love the variety of creatures that seem almost human-like in their ability to play—otters, meerkats, lemurs. And super cute ones: hedgehogs and sugar babies… Always thought my patronus would be a dolphin (I think because water seems like a safe place to me). For a pet though, I will always have cats.

Favourite number: 5. Has been since I WAS 5. Also a big fan of 23 (having a birthday on the 23rd and all. Note 2+3=5.

Favorite non-alcoholic drink: Really cold water. Is that weird? I drink a ton of it.

Facebook or Twitter: Facebook. I have a theory about Twitter that involves crack. I mean… I’m THERE, but I really don’t quite get it. Whereas I LUUUUUUURVE Facebook.

My passion: The writing. Definitely the writing. And PLAY. And that rocking place where they overlap.

Getting or giving presents: I know the politically correct answer here, but that isn’t me. I like getting them. Giving is something I really enjoy when I absolutely get it right, but I have a really hard time nailing that. I’m not sure if I don’t pay enough attention or what, but I have a lot of anxiety about giving. Whereas I appreciate pretty much anything.

Favourite pattern: Paisley? Polka dot? Something with whimsy, anyway. But not clowns. Something decorated in clown would scare me..

Favourite day of the week: Thursday. It’s all about anticipation. I love weekends, but I love to anticipate them more than the actual experience of it. Besides, Thursday was the first day to truly commit to being naked.

Favourite flower: Probably lilac because when the lilacs bloom they are PRETTY, they SMELL fabulous, and they never lie that spring is truly here (unlike those dastardly hyacinths).


So there you have it... Don't forget it is naked Thursday, so behave appropriately!

Lucky 7 Meme

I wasn’t specifically tagged on this, but I have been generally tagged—blogs I’ve read inviting all to participate… that is how I’m going to go about it, too—any of you who read are invited… but here is the idea.

So, for Lucky Sevens you have to :

1 -Go to page 77 of your current MS
2 - Go to line 7
3 -Copy down the next seven lines –sentences or paragraphs – and post them as they’re written . No cheating.
4 -Tag 7 authors
5 -Let them know

Here's the 777 excerpt from CHRYSANTHEMUM CAMPAIGN

“No. I doubt that, too.”

“Okay, can you stop being so cryptic? Is it the whole Roanoke Garden Society or something?” Cam asked.

“Not all of it.”

“Drat!” Cam sat back and took a larger sip of margarita, then regretted it as brain freeze set in. “Ouch, ouch, ouch!” She held her forehead and tried to massage the roof of her mouth with her tongue, but it took a minute.

Rob set a printed copy of the list on the table and Cam could see a couple highlighted names. Neil Patrick was one. Alden Schulz was another.

“Damn!” Annie said.

“He could hardly murder someone if he was kidnapped!” Cam said.


So there you have it… my little teaser… Anyone who wants to is invited to play… Because I'm a rebel that way...

Youthful Rebellion.

It's TMI Tuesday...

So the latest CD in the car that all three drivers agree on is Airborne Toxic Event, and it has got me thinking... Well to start, maybe I should give you the lyrics

Airborn Toxic Event

from: The Kids Are Ready to Die

...
but punks like us we were always receiving instruction
and you could burn our cloths you could wash out the ink and the dye
but you can't look me in the eye and say you don't feel like a little destruction
and the kids are lining up on the wall and they're ready to die
...

and from: It Doesn't Mean a Thing

…
Now my dad says fuck the details
Just keep your head down hard
Ya got to find yourself alone before you'll find the eyes of God
You make broke and scared and out of jail
Out the flesh of your own heartstrings
But you were born to be a peasant not a king
So just stop acting like your running from something
Ya gonna leave the way you came without a thing
With your heart tattooed and your mind tied to a string
…


This all reminded me a little of The Living End, an Australian band I got very into because of one of my Aussie friends. Songs like Prisoner of Society...

And THAT got me thinking about punk... Punk was a rebel movement—labor class kids in England when labor JOBS had all but died... when hope was hard to come by. And so the music rebelled.


Which in the roundabout way things go in my head, got me thinking of rebellion in general. And rebellion of youth, specifically... and the eras in which youth rebelling have been so enormously prominent.

You see them across the world. And sometimes they are squashed (China, in Tiananmen Square), but sometimes they triumph. What I am most familiar with though, is US history.

I'm not sure we had rebellious youth en masse until the 50s. And I believe, though I have only really studied via pop culture, that part of what led to that was the relative comfort of the middle class... there was CRAVING for that among poorer kids, and TIME on their hands never seen before among the privileged... time to take up a cause maybe they didn't NEED. There were the greasers because that was the option... and the greasers because that was the culture... because THAT seemed to be the road to the future (independence, forward momentum).

This happened again in the late 60s with the peace, love, drugs stuff. This particular movement was actually not unrelated to the availability of birth control (free love being freed of permanent consequences and all), but was also related to the civil rights movement (a belief all people deserved representation) and protest against a war the young were fighting on behalf of the decision makers.

And then somewhere in there, young people lost the purpose of their rebellion. Rebellion became an individual or small group activity. Substance use (which admittedly always was a part) or clothes, but nothing meaningful or ideological. I mean the bigger movements weren't gone—I remember marching against Apartheid in college. But it didn't ever take on the entire young population again. WHY?

I have some theories:

1) The consumer age. During the Reagan Administration credit got cheaper and was given freely, even to college students (I was offered my first charge card in high school—just a Bon Marche card, but I have a suspicion I was the first generation who got it. Then in college, as a junior with no income, I was offered a Visa. Sure, it was only a $500 limit, but ALSO... debt with no income!? GADS!

What this really meant though, was an ease of the pang of want. People are less dissatisfied if they can buy their toys.

2) End of the draft. If the armed services are all voluntary, then the MASSES of young people no longer have to yell and scream when people are sent to war. I mean HECK, they signed on for it.

3) War funded on credit, starting with Reagan, instead of the entire population having to tighten their belts to pay for war we just charge it. This means that the population broadly barely notices. Now while there wasn't a major war between the Vietnam war and the first Iraq one, believe me, there was a heavy stream of military activity: Nicaragua, El Salvador... plus that bloody cold war that cost so much.


So with 30 years of nothing to do because we've been sedated with stuff and asked to give up nothing, we are out of practice. And worse, our kids have never SEEN protest. So at this time when they really should be fired up and fighting for their future, they are largely MIA. I find this sad.

I also hold the opinion that anybody who has never rebelled against something lacks critical thinking skills. If life falls into line, it means either lack of exposure to varied opinions, or lack of engagement in mental activity. Because everybody encounters something they disagree with at their core that comes from someone in authority--a parent, an education system, a religious institution, a government.  Both lack of exposure and lack of evaluation are dangerous, so I hope any children you have rebel at some point against SOMETHING. (that is a blessing, not a curse)

My New Best Friend

So Saturday I was walking down to my Couch to Keg buddy's house for our walk and there was this really fat squirrel on the sidewalk. I said hello to him, because this is the sort of person I am. Instead of scampering away in squirrel-like fashion, he just scooted over a bit to let me pass, never leaving the sidewalk himself. He turned as I passed, not wanting to let me surprise him or anything, but he seemed really pretty comfortable with me passing so close.

I'm not actually a hunchback...

So I met Jackie and we began walking back up the street, me telling her about him, and there he still was, hanging out on the sidewalk. Jackie said, 'Well, hello, baby, come here,' and the little guy DID! He started running at us like we were his long lost family.

So I went past him and ran up to my house, fetching a few raw almonds, and came back out. Darned it if the little guy didn't just eat a few right out of my hand—one out of Jackie's too.

I think the lesson is if you are really friendly, people will just give you stuff.

Erm.

Maybe you have to be really friendly and really cute. It's also possible you need a big, fluffy tail.

In other news, we power walked almost 5.5 miles, including some mondo hills... MAN, were WE tired!


But that is all I have today. I have been meant to be editing, but got sucked into re-reading Hunger Games this weekend, too, so I am behind.

Anyone else have squirrel friends? (I've fed one by hand before, but it was on campus where they all get fed regularly. This was a neighborhood squirrel and it's the first time it's happened so close to home, though Jackie made friends with a chipmunk last summer, so maybe she is the rodent whisperer.

Hunger Pangs (no spoilers, just whining and fangirl squees)

So Hunger Games started at midnight, eh? And I LOVED these books. And I can't go until NEXT WEEK! (need to wait for pay day *pouts*)

BAH!

So I'm going to tell you what I THINK I will love about it. How's that?

1st I loved these books. But more importantly, I think these books are more easily translatable to film than say... Harry Potter... The reason being they are more linear. JK Rowling had so many peripheral details that were in it for the LONG pay off... that the movie-makers kept wanting to drop because they didn't know why it mattered...

These books were ALL out before the movie-making started, so THAT helps—they KNOW the long payoff. But it just is a more straight-forward story. There is no slight of hand needed to make them as compelling as they are, probably because at its core, Harry Potter is a series of mysteries.

I don't really feel like I should compare these books because I will never love ANYTHING like I love Harry Potter, but I think when we are talking book-to-movie translation, it is apt. And the Hunger Games BOOKS really are only about the 2nd series to get me super excited since Harry Potter...

2nd They could not have DONE BETTER than casting Jennifer Lawrence. I've only seen her in Winter's Bone, but that character has the same 'tough because I have to be, not because I want to be' that is both admirable and sympathetic—that gets at the subtle difference between a badass and true hero. Don't get me wrong--there are times Katniss is a real badass, but the reader KNOWS this is a show, and I think Lawrence has the chops to pull that off.  A hero is AFRAID and DESPERATE and pulls something out of their core that they didn't know they had. PLUS, I've seen several interviews with her—she was a huge fan of the series before she even knew they were MAKING movies of them. Holy cow, every time I see that trailer where she jumps out and yells, “No, take me! I volunteer!' I cry... sheesh... I'm crying just THINKING about it. The squeak of desperation to save her sister... That girl both CAN ACT and really GETS this role.

Not positive, but I think I'm underwater

3rd I read what Suzanne Collins had to say about where the movie embellished and she was thrilled at how they had carried forward the WORLD building stuff. This is not an 'other world' movie, so as narrator in the book, Katniss is a little sparse until she gets to Panem. Suzanne Collins sounds like she loved the interpretation and I am excited to see it. This is OUR world, a generation or two into the future where natural disasters have really limited population and resources (note what is now under water) that has been restructured in a totalitarian way--with a central government, circa Denver, and then districts that each provide a kind of 'good' that the central government distributes (keeping enough for itself and leaving all the other districts short)

4th My kids and neighbors (the couch to keg team) and maybe even my friend Patti are going with me. Patti and I have never met in person, but through a mutual friend have become good friends online and she lives just two hours from me... she thought it sounded like fun!

So I am really looking forward to this, but I have to wait for freaking PAY DAY!


Anyone go to the midnight showing last night? Are you excited about this one? When will you see it? Have you read the books?

Reviews: to Hear or Not to Hear

Actually... that should be to listen or not to listen... but that doesn't have the right cadence, does it? (and I DO like cadence) I remember a conversation once with my friend and neighbor from Colombia who asked be the difference. She said, “You say listen, I say hear. What is the difference?”

Well, my friends. Hearing just happens. It is a sense, and you do it whether you are trying or not. Listening is ACTIVE and requires attention on the part of the listener. So while we might HEAR all reviews, whether we want to or not, our decision is whether to LISTEN.

Why am I on about this?

My reviews were posted yesterday afternoon for my excerpt.

Now is when I decide what to listen to.

First note: My reviews seem sparse. This is a reviewer by reviewer thing, I think. A couple people shared theirs and some are really long. But each person had several to do, so I don't really begrudge 'short'.

I am going to share them, and as I go, in purple ink will note my thoughts...

ABNA Expert Reviewer 1

Designed by Joris Ammerlaan

What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?
The plot is really interesting. I just want to see what that girl is going to do next. Athena seems like a capable and responsible girl, struggling against the world to survive.YAY!  Thank you!
What aspect needs the most work?
It needs some editing for misspellings and grammar mistakes - minor work. The very first scene might be rewritten to be a bit less explicit in case school libraries object to it. On typos: Erm... a little. I went through and found 3 actual typos--one in the pitch, two in the excerpt... As far as explicit?  I don't actually believe this. I have already toned it down a lot. I think it's necessary for setting up the desperation of the situation.
What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?
It is very promising and I hope someday to read the whole book.Thank you!

ABNA Expert Reviewer 2
What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?
The writing is very good--suspenseful and evocative. The pacing is good.Thank you!
What aspect needs the most work?
Athena's situation is pretty grim and not exactly an appealing read. I don't know if it can be toned down a bit without diluting her reason for taking to the streets, but from the first pages, I wasn't keen on reading about it. Others may feel differently.  See... I see this as entirely preference. And I see the PREFERENCE as contrary to what a lot of teens want to read. YES, it's grim. THAT is what makes OVERCOMING it so BIG.
What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?
Well-written and promising. I'd keep reading unless things get really gruesome.


General thoughts:

I was a little surprised, with sort of luke-warm reviews, to pass. But I think (and respect the reviewers for recognizing) that their problems with it were sort of taste issues.  A person who read a lot of YA would know a lot of it is sort of explicit--and my explicitness is, I feel, necessary, to set up the situation so a girl has no choice but to leave home. If it wasn't horrible, she wouldn't need to GO, now, would she?

I DO though, really appreciate that both seemed to recognize that. I clearly must have had adequate scores to pass me through, so what they actually rated me on was fine.

On the other hand, I reread it last night and think it could actually be trimmed by about 20%. I have a tendency to write EVERYTHING that happens, when the story only needs the important points. It's been pared a little, but not as much as it could be.

You should be able to read it here (top entry, page 4) SOON. And looking over it... In spite of the overshare,  I think it moves along pretty well anyway.  The lists can be found here.

Whatever the case... How do YOU feel about reviews? When do you listen and when do you smile and say thank you, but ignore?

Mish Mash o' Stuff

This is the actual one: photo taken from Hudson Mills Metro Park

Today I am REALLY over at Burrowers, Books and Balderdash talking about the tornado that came THIS CLOSE last week. But I gotta couple sumpin sumpins here...

(the photo to the right is actually from a video--these loons stood there recording the thing when they should have yelled RUNAWAY and then DONE IT!--but you can find it on YouTube--Dexter Tornado)

So yesterday's post had a lot of great responses, but one in particular was HELPFUL... my friend Kathy actually does this disaster preparedness stuff and has a great blog with that in mind, in case you think you want to start prepping!  Go check this out. Some of it, I am not nearly domestic enough for (or don't have the storage or marital fortitude for---hubby can't handle what HE calls hoarding) but a lot of the ideas are great!

Next up...

L. Diane Wolfe is holding a Sad Songs Blogfest on March 30, so head on over and sign up! List the sad songs that really inspire you!

And finally...

Today is one of the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award cut-offs--Quarter finals. I should find out mid-day some time and will come leave a note when I know. Whatever the case, you can rest assured I am currently obsessing and hitting refresh at least hourly. And then I will hit the ABNA boards where some sad people will behave very badly. Always happens. I love this contest and this community, but I think there is a growing process we all need to go through and for SOME people it is instigated by an ABNA cut. I've pouted and ranted about my work being better than I thought I was getting credit for. (secret:  It really wasn't ready yet, but you won't hear it until you hear it... usually requires writing something BETTER to see it).  Anyway, if you could all send a little mojo, it would be very appreciated.

UPDATE:  I did in fact make Quarter-finals, as did a few of our blogger friends. So congrats, too, to Roland Yeomans and Theresa Milstein!

Plan your Apocalypse

So I was thinking about Encyclopedia Britanica stopping their PRINT versions (in the news last week)... and it got me thinking about the Apocalypse... Oh, I know. It doesn't take much to get me to thinking about the Apocalypse. Though for newbies, let me clarify, this isn't a religious thing... it is a GIGANTIC world shift caused by natural disaster (meteor), unnatural disaster (nuclear war) or plague.  In ALL cases though, I see an interruption in... you guessed it... THE INTERNET!

So if the most recently printed manuals of how to DO STUFF in most people's homes are... you know... ancient... (My own set of encyclopedias is dated 1974), because we are all counting on just looking it up online when we need something, then how the heck do we figure out what we need to know in an age of no more stores, no more printed reference materials and NO MORE INTERNET!?

When that disaster strikes, chances are all communication goes. It WOULDN'T if we still had those ground lines linked place to place... those require no power. We could talk on THOSE, but the new system is not a HARD system.

There would be simple radio waves... walkie-talkies, Ham radios. Although that Ham needs power, so could only work with a generator. Still, I am a granddaughter of a Ham radio operator who talked to people all over the world and I have great faith in that system, were the other ones to fail, as the mechanics of it are simpler.

So if all this internet stuff disappears with that meteor hit or nuclear strike, or large enough epidemic that the population is decimated, what do you NEED? What is that crucial information you maybe should have in a hard copy?


Here are the things I would want handy:

Simple motor. (repairing, but ideally, also making)  I would like to be able to do some basic repairs for say... a really old pick-up or lawn mower. Jericho (the TV show) had a power surge that knocked out anything with an electronic chip, so the only watches that worked were the old fashion quartz, the cars with computerized panels seized, NOTHING digital worked. So the old cars became the only ones they could work.

Plant guide for naturally growing stuff. Talk about a time it would be nice to know how to eat off the land. There are some edible tubers (bulbs) and distinguishing which berries and mushrooms are safe would be very helpful.

A nice list of crucial minerals and such. Like I know they put iodine in salt because we need just a little. Same reason they put vitamin D in milk. Sources of the things we need would be good to know.


What would I DO if this happened?

Well honestly, it would depend a little what was 'out there'. All the shows based on an Apocalypse make travel look pretty darned dangerous. But my concern is where I live is very densely populated, so resources would grow scarce very fast. My instinct is I would head west (probably by going north first--maneuvering through Chicago is not even a little appealing under these circumstances--better to get up to highway 2 and cross—try to get to where my family is in Idaho. There are fewer people there to try to live off more space, and while northern Idaho is infamous for its militia-minded people, I grew up here. I don't believe these people are generally hostile, they are just anti-government. They are not the sort to move out and steal from neighbors. They are more the type who just feel justified defending their own lands through any means necessary. And I don't believe, if there were a large-scale population wipe-out, that I would have any need to try to take anything from anyone who was still around.

What about you? What instructions are you now thinking of printing up? Where would you go?


Side note for the curious:  The motherboard on my laptop is dead and the cost to replace is almost that of a new computer. I decided to have them pull the hard drive and I am currently using it as an external hard drive for my desk top... something that is only a short term fix, but for now, will work.  So I'm back, but limping a little, probably until summer.

Naked Season Approaches!

HUGE Apologies to Laura for forgetting Bloggamonsta Blogfest!!! I'm so sorry! Broken computer threw me for a loop...


It's been a while since I've espoused the joys of nudity, but you know what? It is supposed to hit the 70s this week and it is time to GET NAKED!

MAN, how I love Naked Season.

I walked home from work last night without my coat. Comfy. Not warm, but warm is coming... I mean not WARM WARM, but warm enough to shed the layers.

See, when the clothes are shed, the sun and breeze (and sometimes rain) can kiss your skin. It's so nice... communing with nature a bit... actually making a little skin contact when you give someone a hug...

There is no BINDING or ITCHING or CHAFFING from irritating clothing.

And Naked people are so much HAPPIER! (see itching, binding, chaffing). It is really HARD to be crabby when naked. If you don't believe me, just try having all parties get naked next time there is an argument. See how long you can be a crabbypants with not pants!

Say it with me:  Pants are evil! Down with pants!


On that note, I have to get back on my fitness schedule. Being sick threw a cramp in the exercise routine (and the eating one, too, if I'm honest, which I try to be... though if I'm REALLY honest, the eating routine was already suffering). But at the moment, while I am happier naked, I'm not sure the rest of you would feel that way.


And THAT THAT said, something is wrong with my laptop and I need to get it into the doctor. The timing couldn't be worse—I was almost done with edits to send back to my editor for BEGONIA BRIBE but they are stuck on THAT machine. Our home desktop has a cracked monitor, making any typing a challenge. So I think this week will be a down week for me on the blog—I am VERY sorry on that front, but I just can't predict how long this will take to get sorted.

Sea of Sickness

Last week I had two sick days in a row. It is the first time I've taken two sick days for my own illness since 2000, so you know it isn't the kind of thing I do. I am both healthy and am not the kind of person to skip work for small things.

But man, whatever this bug was knocked me on my butt. It was a lung thing. And an ache thing.

But Sunday, after four nights of more than ten hours of sleep, and after many many iterations of boiling water with lemon, ginger, honey... sometimes whiskey... Down time. Out of the weather time.... by Sunday I was feeling MUCH MUCH better.

I am still not 100%, but I finally feel like I have an ordinary cold rather than Satan's revenge.


So What Does a Girl Do When She Feels Like POO for four days?

She edits! DUH!

I managed to finish my run of BEGONIA BRIBE, send it to my super duper buddy Stacy, and get started on my first revision of CHRYSANTHEMUM CAMPAIGN.

Stacy is AMAZING and has gotten 100 pages back to me already—catching all sorts of the gaffes I didn't catch that were caused by the timeline change. I am so thankful to have a friend able to back me up last minute.


Honestly, it was sort of nice to have a weekend where I didn't feel up to doing much so I could just be still... read... mark... enter changes... I am not back on track with my editing, but I made some progress.

That said, that is sort of all the time I have for blogging at the moment.


Anybody else catch this nasty that is going around?
Anybody else geeked for good weather coming this week? (Michigan is supposed to hit 70)
Anybody else making good editing process?

I wish all of you a happy Monday! (even if that is an oxymoron)

Detour, Blogfest, and a Free Book

This picture makes me giggle

I am really over at Burrowers, Books and Balderdash today, telling a little story that sort of happened, sort of didn't... though I have no idea where the line crosses...

(it goes up at noon, GMT)

But besides that, it is Cherie Reich's BIRTHDAY and to celebrate, she is giving away her novella!  This is the same one she talked about here just last week. So you should go get it!

 And then there is a FUN blogfest I should let you know about. Siv's Bloggiversary happened this week and she got to thinking about how she started blogging... And, being from Norway, of course it involved trolls (of a personal sort) and she dove in (for which we are very glad).  Anyway, she is having a blogfest this month to honor our blogging roots.  You should go check it out.

Is this me, or what?

See you over at BB&B!

Have I Lost It?

(Did I ever have it?)


I probably could have used yesterday's whiny baby post for my Insecure Writer's post, but you know... if there is an excuse to whine again...

Most of you know by now that Alex the FABULOUS, along with a few buddies, run the 1st Wednesday Insecure Writer's Support Group. Because let's face it, we are ALL insecure.

My LATEST insecurity?

Have I lost my blogging prowess?

I mean... I know I still have FABULOUS blog friends. But in the last year I've lost comments per post.... I'm not sure what that is about. Being offensive? I somehow doubt it. I've been no more naked or honest than I've always been.

But I think I've lost my ability to keep on TOP of it all. I still feel like I try to comment on others regularly, but... maybe I've taken on too much? Maybe I'm not getting to people as regularly. My strategy maybe needs to be more organized. I feel like a buffoon. Like I'm failing. But it isn't taking me any less time. Have I lost my skills at this?

Oh, man, I hope this isn't true...

Or is the blogging community maybe... growing less slowly? But growing more quickly at the same time? What I mean is, are there new bloggers but not necessarily new readers? Or are readers not getting around as much generally? Has anyone else experienced this? Even work for diminishing gains?

I hate the sound of that... gains and losses for what really are friendships. I don't feel less close to anyone. Maybe that is because the relationships, once established, are THERE. But I have to say, I am impressed as all get-out with those of you who seem to get around SO REGULARLY. Often to many more people than I EVER could.

Anyway... love to all of you struggling. I definitely believe this is getting harder.

Who Cares?

It's TMI Tuesday, so I thought I'd talk about this very strange phenomenon of WHO CARES about our writing. I shared my 3 month anticipation post yesterday, and posted it not only to my writing profile, but also my personal profile on Facebook.

The very very COOL thing is that actually a LOT of people seem to care... Friends. Family. Nice notes. People I only knew very peripherally once upon a time. In fact there are people who seem to have known me that I didn't know hardly at all... people I know names for but for whom it never occurred to me it went the other direction. My policy on FB is first and second degree friends for my personal profile—if people know me, or are friends with a friend of mine... I even have a few writer friends I bonded more tightly with—people I've known long enough to establish some trust.

So I felt really really loved yesterday. Hugged and cozy. I loved it.

But there are also the absent... Now I get that not everybody is on Facebook every day. There are people I've been friends with forever who seem completely oblivious, even though they ARE around a lot. I don't feel any fear they will stumble in HERE. I am clearly not on their radar. But how much effort is a freaking 'like' when you see someone post really good news?

A couple of my high school friends have sent me personal notes—email. And I don't begrudge them at all. They aren't online much. But if you ARE online?

I can't help but get a little paranoid that either my nudity or my politics have alienated people.

Now I have a LOT of non-naked or politically incompatible friends—heck, I grew up in Idaho where my politics fit not even a TINY bit. But in OH-so-many cases we can argue civilly, agree to disagree, or stick to other topics. They are great people.

On the not-interested, though... I mean maybe they aren't interested in writing... I get that. No. I don't get that. But... so here's an example. I have some friends who craft. Scrap-booking or jewelry making. I don't do that. And the scrap-booking, in particular, I'm not that interested in. It is one of those super-mom traits that missed me entirely. But if one of my friends was... putting on her own SHOW or something... or had sold a pattern (does that fit—I am a little clueless here)--but you can tell what the successes are, yeah? I could BOTHER to hit the freaking LIKE button. I would recognize it as big in their area of interest, and therefore to be applauded.

Am I being a bitch? I am not holding anything against ANYBODY who says 'yay' every once in a while. I know not everybody sees everything I post. But never? Do I have bad breath? Am I being annoying? Boring?

*cough*

So there is my little Tuesday mini-rant.

Three Months from Today...

I have tummy flutters. We are entering into the 'this is really happening' zone. On June 5th The Azalea Assault. My first published book, will be released. It came to my attention that the Amazon and Barnes and Noble sites finally have the cover included with the listing:

Amazon
Barnes & Noble

I think this means it is time for me to very seriously begin planning. I know there are a bunch o' you who think I'm nuts that I didn't start this months ago... maybe I am. But I know myself and my ability to push through sort of has a time stamp. I've done some thinking... writing DOWN of the plan. But I have also had some obstacles to doing too much.

In fact some of those obstacles are still in place. My finances are sort of tied... So I have bookmarks and postcards I plan to order, but until I get my taxes back, I don't have the means to order.

My plan, on that front, is to concentrate on the geographic areas where I have ties. The Pacific Northwest and Michigan, in particular. I also want to send postcards to the Roanoke area. So in the short term it is time to make a list. The specific libraries and book stores I plan to contact need to go in a database so once everything arrives, I can turn it back around quickly.

I also had a nice surprise Friday... my first Advanced Readers Copies! Not a lot of them, but very exciting because they are THE FIRST! My husband is even reading one. I know this isn't that unusual for a lot of you, but HWMNBMOTI has deep suspicion of fiction. He generally only reads histories and the newspaper.

I was surprised it didn't have the cover. The only ARCs I've gotten have the covers, but then, those have come directly from the publisher... and there haven't been a ton of them.

So I guess the ball is really rolling. I am going to be a published author soon! I hope you all don't mind that probably the blogs related to getting a book out may increase. I've never done this before, so it seems to me it will occupy a lot of my brain and what I have to say.

To get started, I would TOTALLY love you if you would be willing to LIKE me or FAN me...

Facebook Alyse Carlson Fan Page  (I promise not to spam you--only real updates)
Goodreads (I guess marking it as 'to read' is best option here until I figure out how to set up an author page under my pen name)

THANK YOU!