Thursday, September 24, 2009

Nudist Movement

Since I’ve been forbidden from starting Naked Thursday in the common room, I’ve taken my movement abroad… AND IT’S SUCCEEDING! (and there was much rejoicing)

The first evidence came about last March…
Naked Hiking in the Alps (brrrrrr)

And then just yesterday somebody alerted me to

Nude Hiking in Germany (warning, naked people)

And so with my small achievements in Continental Europe, I’ve decides to rile up the nudist movement in the US, and what better time than fall?! The climate is perfect! Not so hot that you get sweaty and your skin chaffs. Not so cold you wish you had *gasp* clothes on.


Call your congress people! Write them letters! Tell them we want nude hiking in the National Forests! Imagine Old Faithful admired by masses of naked people! It’s glorious!

Oh, I know… now all my friends from Idaho are going to write and say, ‘what’s this about? It’s no big deal. We’ve been hiking naked since the 60’s.’ And that’s all well and good to you rural folks, running around in the buff where nobody will SEE, but isn’t this an activity you think everyone ought to be entitled to? Hiking into a little lake outside of Elk River is lovely, but wouldn’t it be nice to do the Grand Canyon? I’m just sayin’…

*giggles madly*

Monster Math

World Domination Plans aside… I’m not ACTUALLY a power hungry bitch… the whole world domination thing is really about making everyone be NICE to each other (something naked people are inclined to do).

[artwork from deviant art artist Autumn16Solstice]

But somehow… every time I try to help somebody with MATH they think I am trying to squash them like little bugs. My husband lectured me last night on not being more patient with my daughter (all I did was go away when she told me to). The PROBLEM, is that she and I speak a different language when it comes to math. The hubby says ‘you can’t skip steps’ but I don’t even know I’m MAKING steps… my brain just does it. My son got my brain, my daughter got his, so it’s not surprising he thinks I’m being tricksey. The problem is, since he doesn’t get it either, he can’t be the helper. I just hope she will follow through with her teacher’s free hour and get help from someone who knows how to teach math.


I have made a call for nominations to the facebook group, but if you, or anyone you know, wants to nominate an agent or publisher for a lapdance, (explained HERE) then please email me!

And Happy Delusional Thursday to all!


Galen Kindley--Author said...

True story. I was hiking in the Cascade Mountains of Washington state…on a date mind you….when around the corner comes a topless woman hiker. I was unprepared for this, I’m afraid, and yes, I gawked. My date, however took it all in stride…no pun intended. But, think about it, what do you say to your date…and someone I didn’t know very well? Well, there are a thousand lines, I know. I think I just turned smiled, shrugged and continued on my way.

Best Regards, Galen

Imagineering Fiction Blog

Hart Johnson said...

Galen, that is why I will ALWAYS be a Pacific Northwest girl at heart! I love it!

Elspeth Futcher said...

We who live on the west coast are a special breed. I think it comes from having both mountains and the ocean within easy traveling distance. I'm from BC and I wouldn't be surprised to hear a story like Galen's from around here.

By the way, you will have to fight me for world domination. I'm planning on accomplishing it right after I conquer my procrastination habit.


Elizabeth Spann Craig said...

Wow, I'm just trying to imagine how quickly a topless hiker would be arrested in the South! The mind boggles. :) You can always try to work your magic on the region!

Math...ugh. My daughter has 'new math' now. I don't understand either new or old math. Sigh.

Mystery Writing is Murder

Natasha said...

Grrr. Blogger ate my post :-(

Tami, India awaits you and the nudist movement. Someone needs to save the country from the yards and yards of cloth it consumes every year.
Hartpur is yours for the taking.

And I so hear you on the teaching maths and being hard on the first child bit - not only are we twins, we married clones, and our older kids mirror each other.

Hart Johnson said...

The northwest and south are indeed about as opposite as things get!

Elspeth-I didn't know you had world domination plans. What's your platform?

A lot of work to do to get that south naked! I've been working on it (huh, Kas?) and have a couple key lieutenants in Arkansas, Texas, and Florida. Natasha, I am all over Hartpur, though I LOVE all the glorious Indian cloth--not to wear, mind you, but the bright colors please me.