Ever After

You know how I'm mean and rotten, right? Well today, I am inflicting my nasty self on YOU. I am here to disillusion you. To SQUASH your rose colored glasses to smithereens. I am jerking the JO out of your MOJO. I hate to do it, but I promise, it will be better for you in the long run.

Happily Ever After is a FARCE written to trick little girls into good behavior and submission. It is a MYTH. You heard me. IT DOES NOT EXIST!!!


Now before you all run off crying like mamby pambies, I do want to throw you this lifeline... I believe in Happily MOSTLY After. I'm just saying, after you find each other, there is a lot of WORK WORK WORK, and most people are a little bad at that part and so those with Happily EVER After illusions have to live with Happily SHORTLY After. Whereas those of you undergoing shock treatment today, as a LOVING SERVICE BY ME—Your Tart in Service—will know... If you put in the work, and forgive a lot (because all of us are pretty darned thoughtless at least now and then, and downright MEAN when we are scared, super angry, or insecure)... then that Happily MOSTLY After is yours for the low price of trying harder than you think your partner is... a lot harder (he will think HE is trying a lot harder... this is the nature of perceptions)



So Now the (easy) QUIZ. What is REAL and What is a BIG FAT LIE?

Evergreen Trees:   REAL (these are in Oregon-- I was stunned, when I moved to Michigan in 2000 to learn some forests were NOT Evergreen... it had never occurred to me.)












Evergreen College: SURreal: No majors. No grades. They do give degrees though, and students love it... and apparently learn quite a lot, though some of it more in the 'life' realm.

Everlasting Gobstoppers: Gross exaggeration:  As sited in movies...

as sold in stores...

Everclear, the band: REALLY REAL (I heart them: Art Alexakis is the best songwriting storyteller ever) *cough*

Everclear the beverage: Unreal (or maybe that was just a blackout)—there might or might not be college incidents to disclose related to this, but I deny every one of them... (it was illegal in Idaho, but Oregon is more liberal on such matters.)

Ever AFTER: BIG FAT LIE (and the 50s was the last time any thinking woman believed it... men believed it until the 80s because that 60s-80s thing when women worked AND did all the family/housekeeping stuff was pretty darned good for them)



There. So now you're smart. Keep in mind you probably are going to now protest romance novels, but maybe we can change the genre a bit. That might or might not be my own personal agenda *shifty*


And I have Four E Blogs to share, largely because I really love all these ladies and a little because when there are 4 E Blogs I ALWAYS hit, I would feel badly only excluding one or two (see, I'm not as rotten as I act)

East For Green Eyes: Rosie and I are pretty sure we would have been best buds if not for geography and generation (even if she does have a shoe fetish I understand not at all)--but getting geeky on linguistics is just hot.

Ella's Edge: Ellie is a stable oasis in this turbulent writing world—always genuine, calm and fabulous

Erica and Christy: these ladies are a pair I met because Erica did ABNA with me last year (this year, too) and I discovered she is part of the band of us on the Cancer/Gemini cusp who think so much alike...)

and Everything Emerald: and Marjorie and I have been friends since the Harry Potter Days, part of the mad universe of people who are all now family.


I hope you will check them all out!


And Happy Hing Day to All!!! (I might just explain that, when H comes around)