Thursday, August 18, 2011

The Bipolar Lion

I don't know why this is the case, but it seems to always be... the BEST things happen to me under Leo... And the worst... and once again, here I am, being pulled in the most disparate directions possible... lemme e'splain...

And so here I will impose my own personal bias on you... you know the 'do you want the good news, or the bad news?' question? Well I always want the bad news first because I like to end on a good note...


Sad Lion Credit
The Bad

Finances... things haven't eased up, in spite of the extra worker... partly because crap just keeps falling apart... the latest? The freaking DOOR on our dumb car. We have a mini-van... a Sienna that mostly we've loved, but it is a 1998... and this is the 4th freaking door we will have to repair (no, that's not true... we just left one broken, as it was just the outer handle breaking). Does that seem right? I think the lock mechanism fell this time, but whatever the case, the latch now sits too low to catch... it just bangs the loop... and as much as I love a good bang, this is not working. If the door won't close, then we have lights on all night, which means in reality, we have to disconnect the freaking BATTERY each time the car is going to sit, or it will drain of it's juice. We ALSO have had to tie the dumb door shut... not helpful...

So I reiterate... If you are a Sugar Daddy who desires to be the benefactor for a writer... I NEED YOU... small timers need not apply, as I have a family to support. I would like $10,000 a month... sexual favors negotiable, but I really need a one year contract. I will promise you AT LEAST one book dedication and possibly my eternal devotion. Just throwing it out there...


Happy Lion Credit
Now for the good news...

You KNOW I sent Kahlotus back to Amy Tipton yesterday, yes? And I explained to her... because that is sort of how I roll—TMI and all... how my contract at the mo with Ellen (her partner) was just for the Cozies... so if she decided I 'got her' with the suggestions and wanted to rep the book, did she want a project contract, or what?... Okay, I used a lot more words and I tried to be coherent and professional... but that was the gist...

But her response was a resounding, “Yes, I want to represent you, and I would represent ALL of your YA!”

The mystery stuff with Ellen is up to Ellen, and I will leave that open until 'What Ales Me' is cleaned a little so she can see what else I have to offer on that front... And there are adult suspense ideas floating... some of them feasibly large, but I think getting my mystery and YA careers well established first is probably wise.

My PLAN *Buwahahahahahahaha* (you remember it is required to cackle when we say the word PLAN, *Buwahahahahahahaha* yes?) is to write two mysteries and one YA a year... the reason? The YAs are each stand alone-single book things at the moment, which require a little more stewing than the mystery, which will run as series. Mystery also has a little more formula to it... I ALSO am going to try to POLISH an already written book each year (I will do short descriptions of each and ask Amy which she'd like, as several of those are YA, or can be rewritten as YA) One is a YA mystery... hmmm... that complicates things... though it was a NaNo, and though there is a murder precipitating, it may actually play out best as YA suspense (this is Player Down)

I'm so thrilled to have someone willing to look at my career plans (or at least that strand of it) and provide advice. Amy said she really loved my idea for my next one (Medium Wrong) which I will do as first draft for NaNoWriMo this year, though I have fairly detailed planning I want to do first on this. The PLOT isn't so complicated, but the details of it are... detailed... there needs to be a MAP, and then the steady stream of side characters...

Have I ever told you how much I dig maps? Real maps. Fictional maps. Building designs... doesn't matter. I ADORE THEM ALL.

Any of you have news? Any of you dig maps? Any of you have news about maps... because if you do, I may just have to Squee a bit...


Note:  Denise offered to give away a t-shirt that says 'I am an adept of the ancient arts' which if you read her book you will know is QUITE the bragging rights! Very likely to get you all SORTS of propositions, offers of cash and possibly cookies... So... if you WANT to win, just comment, all week long with the phrase 'Kinky Vampire sex' (or if you are a prude you can just say 'I want to win!'). To double your chances, tweet or facebook share Tuesday's or Friday's posts that feature Denise and her book! (and let me know... mind reading is not among my skills)  [Sadly, she can only ship US and Canada]

30 comments:

Jessica Bell said...

THREE books a year? Ohmygosh, HOW? You are one determined naked cookie. I wish I could make goals like that! Congrats on all this. Sounds amazing! SO happy for you!! :o)

Old Kitty said...

Awwww yay for happy lion!!!! They're great big kitties at heart really!!

CONGRATULATIONS with your writerly progress!! It's brilliant that your YAs have been taken under the gorgeous Amy!! HOORAH!!!!! Good luck with that!

Now as for your crazy car door... come on there must be a great big sugar daddy out there willing to have some NAKED?!!? :-)

Take care
x

Christine Murray said...

That's brilliant! It couldn't happen to a nicer naked person. But with three books a year, couldn't you find time to dedicate to two sugar daddies? Just sayin'... ;)

Siv Maria said...

Sugar Daddy...ha ha, how does not want one of those? You good news though was really great so congrats! And are you interested in a map of ghost towns in Denver...LOL! I do so dig maps too :)

Siv Maria said...

LOL, did I forget to mention Kinky vampire sex again...Shame on me!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Crap, I can hardly imagine one book a year!
Do you mow lawns? If so, we'll talk.

Connie J Jasperson said...

You make me laugh!(as usual) I can so relate on all levels to this post.

Deb said...

I am comfortable reading three books a year, but this...aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Good luck Hart. But you won't need it. You're on fire.

L.G.Smith said...

First, I hope someone takes you up on your offer. :D

Second, THREE books a year? Wowzer. I am so proud of myself for kicking one out a year. You go, and may you sign one hell of a big publishing contract for all of them.

Jan Morrison said...

Do you sleep? Ever? This sounds great - the writing I mean and the connection to an agent who totally gets you - wonderful. The money thing -well you know my deario - we are, unfortunately, twins in that scenario. Though I just gave my 2000 protege away and bought a 1997 Toyota - and trust me when I tell you, I'm so so car happy right now. This car is a beaut! Oddly enough, in twin land, the protege needs a new door because I had an...er...argument with a cement pillar in a badly designed parking garage.

Hart Johnson said...

Jessica-yeah--I am determined... and I think my genres are both easier to write than the literary stuff you write!

Jenny-thank you!!! A Naked Sugar Daddy would definitely be best!

Christine--TWO!!! Why didn't I think of that!?

Siv--Ooooh! Yeah ghost towns are good! (I love OLD maps, especially)

Alex-I have a 12-year old who can do your lawn if you can provide transportation...

Connie-at least I'm not alone, then!

Deb-*snicker* I sometimes feel like that's all I read, too, largely because of how much time I spend writing.

LG-I hope so, too! And I have gotten faster over time... the 3 though, is largely my love of WriMos...

Jan-I do sleep, but I do NOT housekeep... Glad you love your car swap! (sorry about the door, though!)

Carol Kilgore said...

I am SO thrilled for you. I think I might have already told you that :)

To top it off, I thought I was the only Map Freak in the world. Real. Fictional. Paper. Online. Building Plans. Floor Plans. What is it about that kind of thing?

I have a map of the manuscript I recently finished :)

Michael Offutt said...

Wow...three books a year Hart. You are amazing. That makes my fingers hurt just reading it.

RosieC said...

Well, I feel your pain with the car. We've been putting off having our brakes fixed for two months (I know, that's the WRONG thing to put off) until the rear right window fell. Just fell wide open. And that night, as only Murphy could have predicted, it rained. Sigh. So we took it in, got the brakes fixed at WAY too much money, and you know what they did for the window since we didn't want to replace the entire window mechanism at $1000+? That shut it with amazing stuff called duct tape (which, I swear, is actually how he told me what they did... no joke... man, I wish I was joking) and then charged us $75/hr for labor to do it. Gotta love mechanics. So, bottom line, if you find that sugar daddy and he's interested in kinky things for extra money, call me, 'kay? I'm not usually one to promise wild sexual favors, but I'm feeling monetarily desperate.

On the bright side, congratulations on your new YA rep. I'm a tad jealous, but I'm really happy for you, too. I can do both. I'm a Libra, after all :) And as an extreme lover of YA, when Kahlotus gets ready to come out, if you want early reviews, I will do tricks for an ARC (those I can't promise anything in exchange for money; see previous paragraph).

*hugs* and congrats!

L. Diane Wolfe said...

I once had a Chevy Z whose trunk lock broke and we could never get it open again - trade you!

Elizabeth Spann Craig/Riley Adams said...

I am so excited for you! That's amazing news!!!!

Journaling Woman said...

Ohhh, yay and congratulations and good luck, Hart!

GigglesandGuns said...

I feel you in the finance department. It's always something and there's never a good time.
You seem to be doing very well on the agent front.
I don't even bother with that particular four letter word (p-l-a-n). Just saying it sends the day to crash and burn.

Lisa said...

Wow! The good news is great news! So fabulous!

A pox on that broken van door and best wishes for finding that sugar daddy. Those suckers seem to be in short supply.

Hart Johnson said...

Carol-Excellent! I am in good company with the maps! I've always loved them and generally make a couple or look them up a lot while writing... keeps me grounded.

Michael-Fingers hurt?! Then again, you are a fantasy guy, yeah? One fantasy book is about two of what I write on word count. Kahlotus ended up about 63K.

Rosie-OH MAN! I would be so annoyed at $75 an hour for duct tape! I am a queen of making due. Sadly, this door thing won't work that way because the broken piece is in the way. I have jerry-rigged stuff all over though. And I will permit you your balance... I'm not even a Libra and I can be both happy for someone and jealous at the same time...

Diane, if our whole family could fit in it, I might think about it...

Elizabeth-thank you!!!

Teresa-Thank you, too!

Mary... see, ME on the other hand... if there is no PLAN *buwahahhahahahahah* I fail to accomplish anything at all.

Hart Johnson said...

Lisa-you snuck in there! Yes, a pox on the door, but not too big a pox, as we still NEED IT! And thank you! I'm very excited.

You don't suppose we could find somebody... Say in Texas.... willing to form a pagan triangle or something to trap some sugar daddies? Or does that have to be a pentagram?

Mustang Sally said...

I'm glad to hear the book news, not so glad about the current financial thing but man do I hear ya!

My most recent absence is your fault you know. You posted that link to your HPANA fan fic and I've been lost there for more than a month. The Marauder story WAS cool, but the Prince's Tale was AWESOME! Then I proceeded to get caught up in some others too. I've just been having a regular Potter reading orgy (and it's been so much more interesting that RL).

I wish I'd been around there when all that story writing was going on, I might even have been inspired to have a go myself. I definitely can see the attraction.

I have managed to find my way home finally. I don't know that I have much to say yet but we'll see.

Clarissa Draper said...

I'm sorry you're not doing well financially but I think that it's awesome that they want you to write so many books. Congrats!

Sarah Ahiers (Falen) said...

well i congrats'd you on FB, but here's one more! wOOt!
Also, i totally hear you about things breaking. We've been to the vet 5 times in the last two weeks, had the basement flood 3 times, had the faucte break and now our dishwasher has crapped out. WHY does everything always have to break at the same time?

Adina West said...

Yaaaaaay! I've been out of the loop for a while but having just joined Twitter (am I crazy?) wanted to pop over and congratulate you. Such good news about Amy Tipton. Hope this will send your writerly career in the direction you want to (and need to) go and that lotsa moula and new car doors will follow. Having grown up with fourth-hand cars I feel your pain. And before you ask, no, gaffer tape is NOT workable on a car door long term.

Hart Johnson said...

MSally-HA! That was you! I saw your comment at Rannaro's story, but the name didn't match so I didn't know who it was!!! Thank you so much! That was totally my stomping ground for learning to write. Fan fiction is great to work on pieces instead of the whole thing at once. Welcome back, though!

Clarissa-thank you!

Urgh! Sarah- sorry you're in the middle of it, too! I hear Mercury is in retrograde... that is the breaking stuff,.... GRRRRRR.

Hart Johnson said...

Adina-thank you! I saw that you were back! Welcome! And I wish the tape COULD work forever!

Lisa Potts said...

I think the good news outweighs the bad in this case and could help solve the bad news eventually, right?

That invisible blog post yesterday was brills! Almost as good as kinky vampire sex ; )

mshatch said...

love maps, and floor plans. don't know why. just do.

LTM said...

omg! omg! Omg!!! SQUEE SQUEE SQUEE!!!!

Congratulations! Super congrats!

And in true T.H. Fashion, you don't get one agent. No no no, silly children. You get TWO! :D <3

(see? I'm playing catchup now that I'm out of the cave.)